Y’Roden closed his eyes, one arm thrown up on the edge of the doorframe, his forehead pressed against it in an attempt to stop the throbbing nerve that thundered at his temple.
“W’Cren,” he growled, “now is not the time for this.” He pushed back and readjusted the setting on his glittering armband, taking the adrenaline down a notch. At this rate, he’d end up snapping the Lord’s neck.
“I’m just making sure you don’t make such a massive mistake as trying to take back the throne,” Peris said, “you wouldn’t have a chance in Nine Hells, Your Highness. Not only are you just a half-blood in comparison to B’Rodyn’s purity, but you have no Queen. S’Hean law states ‘There shall be no King without a Queen’, it has always been, and always will be that way. The balance of the Land requires it. Not that I think your decision to divorce that harpy was a bad…”
The words were cut off short by Ro’s fist as it drove into Lord W’Cren’s mouth, taking the tall Lord off his feet with the blow and sending him sprawling across a divan.
“I don’t think I have to remind you,” the half-elf hissed as he hauled Peris up by the scruff of his neck, “that I love that woman.” He ignored the Lord’s struggles as he hauled him to the doors, one massive boot kicking them open, “She may no longer be my wife, or my bondmate, but that fact hasn’t changed.”
Peris suddenly found himself airborne, sprawling at the boots of the Guards in a heap. “Get him out of here,” Y’Roden growled, spinning round on his heel and stalking back into the room.
"I don't think I've ever been compared to a harpy before," a female voice said coolly, "a bitch, yes. That seems to be quite a common complaint. Harpy is a new one. Don't they generally scream at people though?" A raven brow rose as Silverthorn regarded the fallen Lord with an enigmatic expression, the coldly impenetrable mask that concealed her true thoughts and emotions firmly in place. "Somehow I'm failing to put you, me and screaming into the same sentence. I can't imagine why."
W’Cren lifted his head and glowered at Silverthorn, dragging the back of his hand across his mouth and smearing fresh blood. “Aye,” he snapped, “Bitch seems pretty apt.”
“Shut up,” Y’Roden suggested, “I’m too angry to stop her from slicing and dicing you at the moment. Ja’Kel, what the hell are you waiting for?”
The Ranger in question just grinned at Silverthorn, barely suppressing laughter as he hauled W’Cren to his feet and hustled him off down the hallway.
"I still think we should have gone with that idea of the exchange programme," she said. "If he thinks I'm a bitch I'd love to see what he makes of some of the Guard." A faintly vicious smile curled her lips, "of course, that would take all the fun out of maiming him myself, but spectator sports have their moments too I guess."
The smile faded as quickly as it had appeared, her expression becoming oddly impassive as Silverthorn turned to look at the half-elf who had been her husband. There was no trace of emotion on her features as jade eyes studied him in silence for a long moment. "We need to talk," the elven woman said in the end.
“Maiming him isn’t as entertaining as it looks,” Ro commented, “All the whining takes all the joy out of it. I prefer my victims screaming and begging rather than wheedling.”
He stepped out of the entrance and gestured for her to come in, “Yes… we do.” He shot the remaining Guards a look that communicated his desire not to be disturbed, and closed the doors behind his ex-wife.
Without a word Silverthorn walked inside, making her way across the room as if unconsciously putting distance between them. The walls that she kept around her heart and soul were firmly in place, concealing the volatile cocktail of emotions that bubbled within. Anger, pain, grief, resentment... all that and more simmered inside. Yet none of it showed on the surface, she would not let it. Pride alone would have kept her from revealing how much some things still hurt, and pride was something the raven-haired woman had always had in abundance. She would rather have died than given anyone the satisfaction of seeing her break down.
Turning, the elf let jade eyes meet emerald green, the facade of icy composure unwavering. "I'm surprised Peris waited this long to make his little speech. I was half-expecting him to be on your doorstep the moment you showed up."
“I haven’t been here,” Ro said quietly as way of explanation, “this is the first he has been able to find me.” He looked away from her, approaching the drink cart and hooking the brandy bottle. “Whiskey?” the half-elf asked, “I’m fairly positive you didn’t come here to discuss Peris W’Cren.”
"He's never been my favourite subject at the best of times." She glanced at the bottle, and then nodded shortly in reply to his offer. "But you're right, I didn't come here to discuss W'Cren and his little prejudices."
Snagging the Whiskey he crossed the room and held out the bottle. They just weren’t the drink out of a glass sort of people, and he was done playing charades. “So ask, yell, whatever it is you need to do. The mask doesn’t fool me, it never did.” He dropped into a chair and tipped back the brandy, meeting her gaze straight on over the bottom of the bottle.
Slim fingers curled about the neck of the whiskey bottle, "perhaps so, but it's all you're going to get. You lost the right to know what I was thinking and feeling when you made the decisions you did," the raven-haired elf retorted coldly. The smile that curled her lips was distinctly lacking in humour, "besides, I can safely assure you that you're far happier in your ignorance."
“Can’t argue with that,” Ro said with a shrug, “why are you here then?” He settled the bottle on one heavy thigh and slowly turned it back and forth as he watched her, waiting. She was exactly how he had expected her to be, cold and implacable, encased in a shell. There was something of her old fire back, however, glimmering in the depths of jade eyes, and it was that he found comfort in. Setting Thorn free had likely saved more than her life.
For a moment her fingers tightened around the neck of the bottle. The impulse to beat him around the head with it was strong, not for any particular reason, but simply because he was sitting there so damned casually that it irritated her. Deliberately she forced herself to relax. "The children," the raven-haired woman replied shortly, "or, to be more precise, Fechine. Were you aware he plans to take part in the Obsidian Races?"
One eyebrow lifted a fraction, he hadn’t missed the tell tale signs, and for a moment a particularly irritating grin flickered across his features. Oddly, it reflected one often seen on Shadow’s face, despite there being no actual blood relation. He sobered quickly though and shook his head, “No, I wasn’t aware. I plan on being there myself though, so I’ll keep an eye on him.” He scrubbed at the back of his neck with one hand, “whether he likes it or not.”
"I suspect not liking it is more likely to be accurate." Despite the way she felt towards Y'Roden personally, he was still the father of four of her children, a tie that would be almost impossible to sever. The irritation disappeared beneath the concern she felt for her eldest son. "What did you say to him, Ro? Everyone's been lucky if they can get him to utter more than monosyllables. He's withdrawn so far into his shell I'm not sure he's even talking to Meghan."
She raised a hand to cut off any words, "and before we end up in the usual argument, that wasn't an accusation, merely a statement of fact. I know you spoke to him a few days ago. I also know that before you spoke to him he was stomping around like a mini thundercloud, but he was talking. Now he's not."
“Something incredibly stupid,” the half-elf admitted, “somewhere in there I think I forgot how young he is… how much he doesn’t yet understand.” Resting an elbow on the arm of his chair the S’Hean leaned sideways, fingertips pressing against his forehead. “I’ll fix it… somehow. He is my son, and I love him… I don’t always understand him… but that is all right. I made a mistake… I’ve made a lot of mistakes. It’s going to take a long time to sort out… to sort out a lot of things.”
"Time may be just what you don't have a lot of though. Dammit, Ro..." With a movement so sudden it was startling, Silverthorn slammed the bottle down on a nearby table in a frustrated gesture, turning on her heel. "If you're not careful you're going to lose him. Do you understand that? He isn't Yseult or B'Roden. If you don't find a way to get through to him, and soon, you'll reach a point where you won't be able to reach him. No matter what you do or say. He's enough like me that I can predict that much."
Spinning back around, the elven woman eyed her ex-husband. "He's still so young, but that doesn't mean that he didn't spend nearly all the time you were in the casket trying to be an adult because he thought he needed to be strong for everyone else. It didn't matter what anyone said to him. That was what he believed he needed to do. But it hurt him... It hurt him badly. You hurt him badly. And yes, I know you did what you thought was the best thing for everyone, but we're all still dealing with the consequences of that decision no matter why you made it."
"People are dying, Ro. People have died. Your sister is damned near at death's door, and I very much doubt you're in much better condition if you're brutally honest with yourself. So how much time do you have to make things right, and would you ever forgive yourself if you didn't before you or him are carried off by the sickness, because right now there isn't a cure... or at least not one that anyone has been able to find."
“We’ll find something,” he murmured, “we have to. I don’t give a damn what happens to me, but I’m not going to let my children die. There has to be an answer… somewhere.” He shook his head violently, “I won’t, I can’t let myself think otherwise.”
He met Thorn’s gaze, his expression openly agonized, “I’ll make things right. With Fechine, with S’Hea, no matter what it takes. Do you think I’m proud of the decisions I’ve made? Do you think I’m not hurting as much as any of you? I knew the consequences Arianne, I knew what I was losing, what I was sacrificing, but believe it or not? None of it had a Gods damn thing to do with me. You probably won’t ever understand why, and that is just something I’ll have to live with, but Gods dammit, I am going to live, and so are the rest of you.” He rose abruptly from the chair and shoved shaking fingers through his short-cropped hair, “I’m sorry, alright? For all of it…”
"Good." The word was bitten out almost involuntarily. Just for a moment her emotions got the better of her self-control and all the pain and anger were written stark across her face. "If you had put us all through that and not felt sorry then I think I would have hated you even more than I sometimes wonder if I do now. I don't give a damn about why you did it, Ro. I'm not even really all that concerned about what you did to me. But for what you put the children through, no matter how good your reasons may have been..."
The fury that burned within glowed in her eyes. "I dream about killing you, as slowly and painfully as possible... and what makes that worse in some respects is that they are not nightmares. Boy, are they not. And do you know why I don't? Not because of you, or me... because of them... because I won't put them through losing you again. They are the only thing stopping me from taking you apart right now, but that doesn't stop the thought from being tempting."
“Now there is the Thorn that I remember,” Ro said dryly, “where did she go, I wonder? See, even you know, somewhere deep inside, that this was the best thing for everyone. You can feel it, can’t you.” His emerald greens suddenly sparkled with amusement, “The only thing that even slightly offends me about that… is the fact that you seem so confident that you could.”
The half-elf smiled and shrugged, “You are welcome to your dreams, sweet bloody fantasies that I am sure they are. I’m fairly sure you are not the only one, just think, you can compare notes with Galain, though I’m sure what you have in mind far outdoes anything he can come up with.”
He crossed the room and went back to what he had been up to initially, packing a few things to take with him to Silver Dragon Ridge. “You’re safe, the children will be safe, that is all that matters. Even if it means you hating me.”
"I'd almost managed to forget what a self-righteous prick you could be sometimes," she said coldly, her emotions once more under control. "Fine. Hug your smug little thoughts to yourself. I hope they keep you warm at night. You'd better fix things with your son though, because otherwise it won't just be me trying to decide whether they hate you or not, and I suspect that coming from Fechine would hurt you far more than anything even I could invent."
Jade eyes were hard as they watched him. "You can't truly hate someone unless you've loved them first. Oh, you can loathe and despise them, but true hatred requires more than that. I did love you, perhaps in some ways I always will, but I don't trust you... and neither does your son. No matter what I think of your judgement, the last thing I would wish is to see him hurting the way he is now. Believe it or not, I am capable of putting the children first. Right now they are all that really matters to me. If you let him down again... If you let him down again then perhaps it would have been better for all of us if you'd remained in your casket."
“You knew I was a self righteous prick when you married me,” he pointed out, turning to look at her. “I said I would fix things with Fechine, and I will.” Heavily muscled shoulders rolled in a shrug, “You have every right to hate me Arianne. It may not have been right in your eyes, or what you wanted, but everything I’ve done, I’ve done because I love you, and because I love our children. Gods woman, we’ve been bonded on a dangerously close level, and we still don’t know one another, not at all. I don’t understand you, you don’t understand me, and no matter how much it killed me… literally or not, love just wasn’t enough anymore. Don’t lie to me and tell me it was, not when we were arguing every time we turned around, not when I made you so desperately depressed you wanted to slit your wrists.”
He met her jade eyes, his expression calm, honest. “I love you enough to set you free, Arianne. To want to see the fire burning in your soul again, to watch you live. Let’s face it; somehow, I was smothering you. Look at you now… hardly the woman I left behind. You’re different… you look like the woman I first met.” The half-elf shrugged, “Anyway, the kids, they are always first. Haven’t I always said that? No matter what you believe, my death wasn’t meant to hurt any of you, it was meant to protect you. I wasn’t allowed that luxury for long… so now I’ll go back to the struggle… and hope to hell I don’t actually hurt anyone.”
She was silent for a long moment, and then she said quietly, "I made you a promise once and, whether or not you understand me, I believe you know me well enough to know I don't make promises lightly. If it comes down to it, if there is no other option, I will kill you myself rather than have anything happen to the children. Not because I want to, but simply because it is necessary." There was just a hint of dry humour in the smile that tugged at one corner of her mouth, "and yes, Ro, I am confident that I could. I may not always have confidence in some areas, but killing people was my profession for a very long time and it is something I have down to a fine art. Even for someone as challenging as you, or the Demon Elf, would be."
"You're right though in one respect. I wouldn't take you back even if you wanted me to. I love you, hells you couldn't make this angry if I didn't, you certainly couldn't have hurt me as much as you have done sometimes. Perhaps I always will love you, but I don't trust you. Not completely. I can't be me when I'm with you. Intentionally or not, you always seemed to be trying to get me to be something I'm not." The raven-haired woman shook her head. "I can't do that anymore. If anything was slowly killing me, it was that. We do still have one thing in common though. I love our children. I have no more wish to see them die than you do. If you need my help with finding a cure, then you have it. Otherwise I will stay with them." She gave a half-shrug, "they're the only reason I'm still here."
“I’ll hold you to that promise,” he said quietly, “I wish I had the same confidence that you do, but frankly? I’m not sure even Callan is up to the job. Killing people was the Demon’s job too, for a very, very long time. Perhaps job is the wrong word… hobby, that sounds more like it. A job is something you do because you have to, he did it because he enjoyed it.”
Ro smiled then and laughed ruefully, “So finally we find ourselves in total agreement on something,” he said wryly, “love does strange things to people. Neither of us have been ourselves for a long time, it seems the only way we can be, is to be apart. I don’t think either of us were trying to twist the other on purpose… it just happened.” He dropped what he was holding and crossed the room, offering his wrist, “We can agree then? To get along for the children at least? Without trying to maim one another?”
"Damn, and there I was thinking maiming would be entertaining," Silverthorn said drily, but she held out her hand to clasp his. "For the children... Besides, you can't get rid of me completely. Not unless you want the twins to blow up the palace accidentally anyway." A quick, faintly wicked grin slashed across her face, genuine humour lighting her green gaze.
Ro chuckled, a low sound deep in his chest, “now see, maiming is a bad idea, staying apart generally means staying out of the bed, and we all know how much I hate it when blood is spilt.” The S’Hean winked and squeezed her wrist gently, “I don’t want to be rid of you completely, Arianne. You are the mother of my children, and hopefully someday… at least my friend. I don’t hate you, I don’t want you gone, I just… want you to have what I can’t give you. The children need you, and I would never, ever try to keep you away from them.” He grinned slightly, “I’d kiss you goodbye, but you’d likely try to gut me. So a handshake is just going to have to do.”
A raven brow lifted, "a little sure of yourself, aren't you? Getting too cocky can be bad for the health. You may have decided you didn't want more offspring, but I'm damned sure you don't want to spend the rest of your life as a eunuch." She squeezed gently, and then let her fingers slide out of his grasp. "Take care of yourself, and be warned... the fact that we're divorced won't stop me beating you around the head if you do something dumb." The quick grin characteristic of her family appeared once more, and then she headed towards the door.
A decided smirk had branded itself on Ro’s mouth as he watched her leave, “You too,” he murmured. She was going to be all right, the strength and the fire were coming back. He couldn’t regret what he had done, now that he had seen the result of it. The last button pushed had cinched it. Arianne was Silverthorn Badb Catha once more.
Large fingers curled around the amulet on his chest and he gave the chain a gentle tug. “Satisfied?” he asked, “I know how much you love being right. All this has just nicely proved that I’m meant to be alone.” He looked down at the roiling blood red gem and grimaced, “and by alone, I mean, without you as well.” His hand fell away and the half-elf went back to packing. He had a son waiting impatiently for him back at Silver Dragon Ridge.
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